Do we unconsciously enable bad behavior? New book helps identify relational patterns and set loving boundaries
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NASHVILLE, May 9, 2012 /Christian Newswire/ -- Whether it's the disrespectful behavior of a live-at-home son, the addictions of a spouse, or simply a bad boss, many of us know what it's like to be in a close, yet painful, relationship. Consider these statements:
"He's not so bad ... he doesn't really mean the rude stuff he says to me."
"If I don't rescue her, who will?"
"I know I give in too much, but I'm just trying to make it work. Is that so wrong?"
If any of those sound familiar, you might be fueling unhealthy behavior in someone else. And in Break Through: When to Give In, How to Push Back (May 2012, Worthy Publishing, jacketed hardcover, $19.99, 288 pages), Dr. Tim Clinton and Pat Springle show you how to get out of well-worn relational ruts and into healthy relationships where both parties are respected.
"I see this every single week," says Clinton (The God Attachment, The Marriage You've Always Wanted). "Let's take couples, for example. For most of them, it's subtle -- they're caught in a paralyzing trap, but may not even know it. All they know is, they're afraid to make a move, because if they do, they worry the relationship will blow up and they'll be left all alone."
However, according to Dr. Clinton and Springle, not saying anything is the worst thing you could do: keeping you in an unsatisfying (even destructive) marriage, a job you hate, or a painfully distant relationship with your child. The key, according to the authors, is choosing the opportunity and words to draw a line: a loving line.
"This book is a prescription for how to get that done," says Clinton. "In the name of love, we are losing at love. So our goal in this guide is to help you get back to a healthier you, assess your closest relationships, and start breaking out of emotionally harmful patterns."
Break Through also comes with a self-test to help readers evaluate their relationships.
Dr. Tim Clinton, LPC, LMFT is President of the nearly 50,000-member American Association of Christian Counselors (AACC), and Light University Online, which has over 160,000 students enrolled. He is Professor of Counseling and Pastoral Care, and Executive Director of the Center for Counseling and Family Studies at Liberty University. Licensed in Virginia as both a Professional Counselor (LPC) and Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), Tim now spends a majority of his time working with Christian leaders and professional athletes. He is recognized as a world leader in faith and mental health issues and has authored 20 books including his latest, God Attachment. Most importantly, Tim has been married 31 years to his wife Julie and together they have two children, Megan and Zach. Learn more at www.TimClinton.com and on Twitter: @DrTimClinton.
Pat Springle is the coauthor of the classic work, Codependency: Breaking Free from the Hurt and Manipulation of Dysfunctional Relationships. Prior to that, he was an executive with Rapha Treatment Centers.
